Middle Eastern women going to extremes to save their lives
| May 23rd, 2005This post was removed by request of the author.
12 Responses to “Middle Eastern women going to extremes to save their lives”
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May 23rd, 2005 at 1:46 pm
Many of the female suicide bombers who attack Israel are women who have been caught or suspected of engaging in extra-marital relationships, and are given the choice of an honor-killing or taking out as many Jews as they can. They are more easily caught apparently, as they are more fearful and less driven by blood lust. I have readso many horror stories, and it is the woman’s family that does this to her. I can’t understand how a mother or father or brother could do that to someone they love because another person made a claim against them. Testing for virginity is actually a step up I think. Women have been killed based on rumor and rumor alone–no proof, no evidence, no nothing The truth doesn’t even matter, rumor alone is enough to get her killed. I hope the surgeries help; it isn’t the answer, I’m not saying it is, but it is a bit of protection until there are drastic changes in the world.
This comment was written by Rachel Ann.Report this comment to the moderators
May 23rd, 2005 at 5:16 pm
i lived in south korea back in 2001, and while i was there, i learned that hymen replacement surgery was a common practice over there. i had it described to me as a “pretty surgery” for girls to have before their weddings if they’d “made any mistakes” before their wedding day. the korean women who told me this saw nothing unusual about it at all. i tried to find an appropriate link, but this was all i could find.
This comment was written by jane.Report this comment to the moderators
May 23rd, 2005 at 6:11 pm
Well, don’t blame me. I have so far stayed pure for my future wife, whoever she may be (I’m 26 right now).
This comment was written by Glaivester.Report this comment to the moderators
May 23rd, 2005 at 8:20 pm
This was on an episode of Dr. 90210, minus the death threats. I’m very glad to see that there are ways around this asinine custom.
If I was one of these doctors, here’s what I would say to anyone sending these death threats: “I am not the one who is wrong; you are. I am saving innocent people from the risk of being murdered. It is not my fault that your culture does something so evil.”
The “If suspected, she’s guilty” idea is one of the most obscenely stupid customs I’ve ever heard of.
This comment was written by Kyra.Report this comment to the moderators
May 23rd, 2005 at 9:11 pm
Here’s an article from the Middle East Forum online about honor killings in the ME. It’s long, but worth reading for a better understanding of the topic.
This comment was written by Josh Jasper.Report this comment to the moderators
May 25th, 2005 at 8:27 am
The sheer, sick sadism of it–not only do they want to make it look like someone is hurt and bleeding all over the place, it sounds like they feel obliged to make sure some actual physical trauma occurs. (recalls inept nurse removing staples after surgery on chest) All right, I couldn’t stand to read the full article, excuse me if I misread something, but that’s what it sounds like, that and stuff I ran onto somewhere back. You’d think a doctor could figure out rig up something that’d look, sound and feel spectacular to the man–maybe have a bunch of confetti fly out–but be imperceptible to the woman. Heck, for that kind of money there ought to be a reset button and fireworks.
This comment was written by Angiportus.Seriously, though, the whole thing is just too sickening for me to go into any farther, and I can only hope for those drastic changes to come soon.
By the way, how come books and websites for young girls here in the US–even those that seem feminist and pro-sexual-freedom–don’t get more explicit on how to make sure that no pain, bleeding, etc., happpens when they start having sex? They say it might or might not happen but they don’t say how to prevent it–when they are preventive enough about all the other dangers of sexual activity–at least the ones I’ve looked at have a sort of blank spot there. I can’t see letting that happen to anyone I care about. Let’s clean up our own back yard too.
Great blog, by the way.
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May 25th, 2005 at 1:38 pm
I remember noticing that years ago — I actually tried to find information on women’s virginity and how to make that transition less unpleasant. I couldn’t find more than a sentence or two on the subject anywhere. A few books said explicitly that for anyone reading the book, virginity would be a distant memory.
In a decent society, it’s exactly the sort of subject sexual education *would* cover. But no, we’ve got the dual messages that teens mustn’t have sex, but adults are already sexually experienced, and the transition between the two states is never to be discussed.
This comment was written by Brian Vaughan.Report this comment to the moderators
September 16th, 2005 at 7:26 am
I agree - more information should be readily available regarding how to make the losing of virginity for the female less painful. I’m a 19yr old virgin myself (and a girl) and I squirm when I think that some day I’ll have sex and probably bleed… it’s scary. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-sex or anything - a part of me is rather impatient about my virginity (religious reasons) but some day it will happen, and that scares me. There should be information available to ease the anxieties of people like me and others.
PS: crazy pseudo Islamic hymen politics is primitive and scary too.
This comment was written by Atalanta.Report this comment to the moderators
September 16th, 2005 at 11:16 am
I belive that we middle eastern girls have the right to have the hymen surgury. I am also a patient of the practice and i decended from afghanistan. Alot of afghan girls act lik they are not virgins, i swear probably half the population of afghan or iranian girls are not virgins. This surgery wil help us all now ALL you low life stupid fundamentalists stop getting n our business and get your acts together. thak you
Rancho Cucamonga California
This comment was written by Persian Girl.Report this comment to the moderators
February 16th, 2006 at 12:18 pm
Well, I think going through the whole F***** up surgery will make a girl’s life become no more than a lie to her ownself & whoever her husband is going to be…and she will have to live in totol denial for the rest of her life….I think if a girl is planning to get married to a man who is not the same man who broke her virginity, she should be sure enough that he will accept her the way she is…. and if the question does pop up like “Hey hun, I want to make sure, are you a virgin?” she should answer “why hun, are u?” The double standard thing should burn in hell…
This comment was written by Lebatease.Report this comment to the moderators
December 20th, 2006 at 3:54 am
Dear Persia Girl,
This comment was written by Afghan surgoen.First of all I would like to tell you that I’m proud of your courage to tell this on the net.
You know, I don’t agree with you that 50% of the Afghan girls are not a virgin. Perhaps this is true in the California Afghan society you live in. But please don’t generalise it. Virginity is the most precious thing a bride gives to her husband on the weddingnight. I know that the womensright acivists would think differently… But I cherish the Afghan tradition and culture. I do agree that the boy also should be a virgin on the weddingnight.
Concerning the surgery: I think starting your married life with a lie is not a good thing to do. I live in the Netherlands where I grew up and did my school, MD and surgery residency. Specially in cities like Amsterdam and Rotterdam there are a lot of Turkish, maroccan and iranian girls who come for this kind of operation. I to perform it, it really hurts me inside. Cause I help someone decieve someone else. That is a sin in islam, christian and jewish religion!!!
Anyway,
If you think you can have a good marriage after doin such an operation, then it is your choice and your life. May good help my Afghan sisters stay on the right path and keep the Afghan pride alive.
Good bless you all.
The Afghan Surgoen
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January 27th, 2008 at 11:19 am
I am half-iranian and half-english. Please everyone just pull back and look at the human side of this bullshit about who is a virgin and who is not. I have been to Iran as a child and for the rest of my life I live in the United Kingdom. People who worry about such a petty thing as virginity need to grow up and get a life. For God’s sake people are at war and dying every single day worldwide yet we still concer ourselves with such outdated nonsense. This is the 21st century and regardless of religious beliefs every individual has the right to live their life in the way that is best for themselves. Surely we must all try to remember that when two peoples hearts are united in love and they want to get married then what has gone before (in terms of past sexual activity really ceases to be important). For the record I was born a Muslim but I attend Christian church services with my mother because I love God. We would all do well to remember that Allah is merciful and kind so lets stop persecuting women because they have chosen to have sex. It is not as though they are serial killers. I am appalled at these virginity restoring operations. They are fake and nasty–never the good foundation for married life.
PEACE AND LOVE TO ALL PEOPLE WORLDWIDE LET LOVE HARMONY AND PEACE TAKE CONTROL DOWN THIS BULLSHIT OPPRESSION OF FEMALE SEXUALITY,IF U DON’T LIKE THE WAY WOMEN LIVE THEIR LIVES THEN DO THEM A FAVOUR AND SET THEM FREE FROM YOUR CRAP IN OTHER WORDS FUCK U IF U CANT ACCEPT ME FOR WHO AM I. GOD LOVES US ALL WE WERE CREATED IN HIS IMAGE HOLD ONTO LOVE AND LOVING THOGUHTS DO GOOD AND DON’T WORRY ABOUT MINOR LITTLE BITS OF STUFF
PEOPLE LOVE FAMILY FRIENDS AND GOD, LIVE AND GOOD LIFE,IT MAY BE HARD BUT FOR THE GOOD ONES HEAVEN WILL COME.LET US ALL TRY TO NOT BE SO HARD ON ANOTHER BECAUSE SURELY HUMAN LIVES ARE PROBLEMATICAL ENOUGH ALREADY?
This comment was written by NINA.Report this comment to the moderators