From a breastfeeding momma of a 10m old,

Gaia

Breastmilk also benefits preemies because the milk that a woman produces after giving birth prematurely has a higher fat content than the milk of women who deliver at term, which helps premature babies gain the extra weight they need.

Breastfeeding can be done more easily with one hand (or with no hands if the baby is in a sling), which makes it possible for mothers to do other things like eat, write checks, type at the computer, or tickle a four-year-old while nursing the baby.

Realizing that you can provide your child with complete nourishment without needing the help of multinational corporations is incredibly empowering.

Regarding nursing in public, providing private nursing areas would still mean that women would have to interrupt what they are doing whenever the baby needs to nurse. One of the places I often had to nurse my babies was while waiting in line at the bank or elsewhere. If there had been a designated nursing area, would I have given up my place in line to go and nurse? NO!!!!

At church, I had the upper hand because I am the church organist. I nursed my little ones while I played the organ. Nobody made a stink about it. There were some people that didn’t like it, but they knew me and they knew that given a choice I would leave my post at the organ and go nurse my baby. Have a nice service without me!

In other words, breastfeeding is a sexual display, like flashing a penis or wearing short-shorts; it’s also casual and disrespectful, like showing up for services in in appropriate clothing.

Breastfeeding is an excellent reason for women to wear tallit.

And that is because of religious ideas of the HUMAN BODY as “dirty”, (not just the female body (though of course the female body is “dirtier”). You’re saying basically, “This is the way things are” without examining *why* things are that way. Why is it okay to wear a mini in some contexts but not others? There’s no natural law that states that, it’s the result of societal taboos and other proscriptions that come from *somewhere*.

As ADS has said herself, it’s not about offending God, it’s about what’s “appropriate”–in other words, it’s about what *other people* would think. IMHO, more to the point, it’s about *why* they would think it. I have to admit to not being religious myself, but I have to ask: if your god(s) don’t care, why on earth should any person?

“I also don’t think God cares about whether children play loudly, but I wouldn’t allow them to do so during morning services.”

I’m in 2 minds about this one, because I also believe our society is fucked up regarding children, but I do have to admit that there’s a possibility your children playing loudly are potentially disturbing others. Whether God necessarily cares about that is probably debatable, but I suppose you could construct an argument about the religious implications of consideration for others. On the other hand, a mother quietly feeding her baby is disturbing only those who are prurient enough to insist on looking at her.

“Please don’t try to tell me that just because I and others like me don’t care to adopt your standards, there must be something wrong with us. That’s just disrespectful.”

I get a bit tired of having this sort of turning-round of the original argument: the fact the some of us are pointing out that we live in a totally fucked-up society that has ridiculous issues about the human body somehow means we’re disrespecting YOU. Er, come again? No, that won’t wash. No one is saying that if you don’t immediately fling off every stitch and dance down Main Street at high noon you are an inhibited mouse. No one is saying you have to do a damn thing you don’t want to. But that doesn’t mean that I am barred from giving my point of view about exactly why I feel society is fucked up. And MUCH LESS does it mean that a nursing mother should behave in those idiosyncratic and, to many of us, totally capricious ways that society deems she should WHEN THERE IS NO REAL REASON OTHER THAN OTHER PEOPLE’S HANG-UPS for it.

It’s as simple as that.

“And for the last time: I am in favor of breastfeeding in public being a legal and mostly acceptable thing to do, except in certain circumstances.”

But you’re not willing to analyse *why* those “certain circumstances” deserve special attention. And also, you don’t explain why on earth any of the rest of us should agree with you. These circumstances are just “special” cos they ARE and if we don’t accept that at face value we’re “disrespecting” you.

Look, to me it’s simple. And I admit that may be because I’m an atheist, so though I carry cultural baggage, I don’t have any religion to add to it. But still, I don’t see why your particular definitions of “appropriate” should bind atheist mothers, mothers of religions different to your, or even Jewish mothers who see things differently to you.

I can’t comment on what goes on in the context of religious services, but out in the public world, the answer to me is quite easy: If you don’t like breastfeeding in front you, look the other way. Or get your own arse up and move somewhere else. And most importantly, admit that it’s YOU who has the problem, not the mother.

But I’d still like you to answer my questions - which you didn’t.

What do you believe is appropriate behaviour for a woman who’s breastfeeding: to refrain from coming to services, or to let her child cry with hunger?

You’re leaving a breastfeeding mother zero options with regards to religious worship due to feelings of what is appropriate or not. I’m not sure how exposing a breast in a synagogue is somehow inappropriate, except that you’re equating it with sexual and revealing styles of dress, which again is squarely smacking of objectifying breasts as first and foremost sexual tools rather than tools of nutrition for children.

You’re also mischaracterizing breasts in the same catagory as penises. Breast is to male breast as penis is to vagina.

I don’t think God cares if I expose a breast, no. Disrobing or dressing inappropriately in a sanctuary isn’t about offending or not offending God. I don’t think God cares about my showing off my upper thighs, but I still wouldn’t wear a mini while reading Torah in front of my congregation. I also don’t think God cares about whether children play loudly, but I wouldn’t allow them to do so during morning services. There are things that are appropriate in some places that are inappropriate in others: that’s sort of a basic fact of society. That which is appropriate in a park, or a swimming pool, or in your bedroom, is not always appropriate in a synagogue, or symphony hall, or restaurant.

And for everyone who thinks that modesty must always be about religion and shame and women being “dirty”: men don’t walk around with their penises exposed either, nor do they come to synagogue in short shorts or shirtless. I am not, in any way, ashamed of my body, nor do I consider it dirty, but I don’t care to expose it to everyone. That’s modesty: not shame. Plenty of people may and do feel differently about what they are comfortable with, and that’s great for them. Please don’t try to tell me that just because I and others like me don’t care to adopt your standards, there must be something wrong with us. That’s just disrespectful.

And for the last time: I am in favor of breastfeeding in public being a legal and mostly acceptable thing to do, except in certain circumstances. I just think the arguments that most of you are using to support that position are besides the point.

People who say nursing is okay as long as it’s done in private remind me of those folks who say they think it is okay to be gay as long as you don’t flaunt it. They do too think there’s something wrong with it or they wouldn’t be afraid to see it. It’s not the fault of mothers or their babies that people in our culture equate breasts only with sex. Why should they be made to feel ashamed?

But what that says to me is that because I don’t feel comfortable inviting controversy or confrontation while I’m nursing, I will continue to feel too uncomfortable to nurse in public, except in specially designated areas. At the mall, they have handy little stalls with curtains in the family room that are perfect for breastfeeding. Except - why should I have to sit in a boring little stall with nothing to look at? Why should I have to be cramped in my too hot/too cold/out of the way car every time my baby gets hungry?

Why should my baby and I be uncomfortable and inconvenienced just because a few people have hang-ups about breasts? Get over it, people. You have sexualized breasts. You have made this into something that it’s not, and you continue to do so when you insist that breastfeeding should be “private.”

You, ADS and Elayne Riggs, are directly contributing to the sense of isolation and depression that many mothers feel. You are hurting women. You are hurting families.

“I have in my own experience not found it to be an issue when mothers breastfed their children in the social hall of my place of worship, but have found it highly inappropriate when they did so in the sanctuary during services. ”

Um, but you’re perfectly o.k. participating in a religion which erased women’s biological capacity with Jesus saying “Here is the bread of my body, eat of this; here is the blood of my body, drink of this.”

Wouldn’t want women’s biology to actually be accepted for what it is…

MUST. MAKE. IT. A . SIN.

Too bad Baal didn’t kick major ass, way back when.

I really wish I could cite this, rather than just sounding dogmatic, but I recall some study that reflected that breast fed children weren’t just happier and healthier, but smarter too. I’m sure it’d make a great addition to the list if anyone else recalls the source (or if I have a chance to book hunt in the family attic for a source)

Middle of three breastfed kids, and my mom was a chapter leader for La Leche League, so I’ve heard quite alot of the benefits of breastfeeding during my life.

Why? Surely breastfeeding - as several Catholics have already pointed out - is an act which is appropriate to be depicted in church. Mary feeding the infant Jesus never shows Mary with a bottle.

And I genuinely would like an answer to this one - Would you feel it was more appropriate for a breastfeeding mother to let her baby cry endlessly during services, or would you prefer her simply not to go to church services at all while she’s breastfeeding?

We do. But I think that many of us just don’t feel that breastfeeding should–much less needs to be–one of those “private” things. I mean, it’s feeding your kid, not engaging in full-on monkey sex with your SO on the cafe table.