And staying at home with a crying baby can get quite tedious if you are the only adult within miles and all your friends are away and everyone looks at you as if you spend the day eating bonbons even if they state otherwise. Really, soemtimes kids, even my beautiful crew, can be bores. Sometimse one just once some quiet. What adds to the aggrevation is no one considers it work if you are flat busted. Then you are suppose to get off you keister and earn money, because you really aren’t working when taking care of your own flesh and blood.

Quite true - my sister likely finds taking care of her toddler and infant to be much more physicaly demanding than her old office job, but she may not have felt the same if her previous job had been as a maid. Especially since her current role as homemaker only includes day to day housekeeping - a maid comes in every so often to mop the floors, scrub the toilets, etc.

1. She was home-schooled for 8 years, and then her parents “made” her go to a school 300 miles away, when she didn’t feel comfortable leaving home (for whatever reason). So she was already looking for ways to hate being there, and she still isn’t over it.

2. After she complained and complained about it, her parents apologized for making her go. So now she has validation for hating the whole experience, plus she has stored up plenty of examples of how awful it was being there. I’m probably making a huge assumption here, but I suspect her roommate(s) were probably the leading characters in her version of “College Sucks.”

3. After graduation, she got a job in media relations, and was astonished that she’s become cynical! Hello, media relations is not the job for you if you want to register low on the Cynic Meter. She loved her job but felt bitter inside - probably still resenting being chucked out of the nest.

4. She finally meets someone who is husband material, moves back home, and sometime during her engagement quits her job. Also, somewhere in here, her father dies. Can you say “guilt trip”?

So now she has made it her life’s mission to save other young women who shouldn’t want to leave their families. Too sad.

It’s disingenuous of you to plead ignorance as to why your initial post might be taken the wrong way. You’re no wounded rabbit among predators, so quit limping.

Don’t worry, MT. You get used to that from Robert, after a while. Sort of like crummy morning commute weather or slugs in your herb garden. :/

How does her viewing your comment as an attack, rather than as a “mild and positive statement”, detract from her seriousness? You initially presented a view - in this case, that homemakers work harder than those in paid employment - without expanding on it.

Such a statement, devoid of context, carries its own baggage. For example, it could mean, ‘women who work outside the home do so merely to avoid the harder, gender-specific responsibility of caring for family.’

It’s disingenuous of you to plead ignorance as to why your initial post might be taken the wrong way. You’re no wounded rabbit among predators, so quit limping.

As a matter of fact, this single mother does both! But really, I was just pointing out the inherent classism in the “homemakers work harder” statement; the inference is that housework is more physically active than work outside the home. It is if you’re a bank executive, but it isn’t if you are a waiter/waitress, custodian, nurse, plumber, carpenter, physical therapist, landscaper/gardener, etc. Granted, there are few of us that work in construction, but there are a hell of a lot of folks in other physically demanding jobs—-a damn sight more than have behind-the-desk jobs. For working class folks, housework is most definitely not harder than paid work. Not just physically less demanding, but better working conditions to boot! Screaming toddlers are much easier to deal with than screaming foremen.

Point being? If you grow up in the kind of home where folks have physically demanding jobs and little-to-no power in how their job is performed, not to mention little-to-no status from that job, you’ll view homemaking as both a welcome change and a cakewalk—even though it isn’t given any real status either.

Exactly how does working outside the home today preclude her from choosing to stay at home once she has kids or even simply gets married? Exactly how does the fact that Jennie thinks that college is bad training for her keep her from going out and working as a maid or a child-care-giver? Would these jobs not be good training? Is there something so inherently wrong about a women working outside the home that even spending her days caring for the elderly at a nursing home is less worthy of her time than simply not working?

La Lubu was not the one to accuse Jennie of choosing to be a homemaker out of laziness, she was simply pointing out that you can’t say that she works harder than women who work outside the home* not only because it’s a stupid argument, but because she isn’t a homemaker Maybe I missed something and Jennie is volunteering full time at the local soup kitchen while she waits for Mr. Wonderful to stumble over her, but if she isn’t, then yes, she’s being lazy and selfish.

*I love how this argument conveniently ignores the vast numbers of women who do both and in fact are often expected to do more of the housework and care-giving than their husbands are, even if they work the same hours. :p….

I’m sure that I could come up with better snark. However, this is your snark - and you’re right, it’s lame.

I made a mild and positive statement - women who stay at home do a lot of work - more, in my experience, than women who work outside. Having done both, and having known lots of women who did both, I think housework is harder than paid work. I certainly know which I would pick to do, given the choice.

You can view this as an attack on working women if you like; however, it simply adds to the perception that you are not a serious disputant of these issues. To be able to discuss, we must be able to describe. We cannot describe if we must engage in petty battles every time we say something more potentially divisive than “flowers are nice.”

One or the other types of work is likely harder; women do both types of work; therefore, one class of woman is likely working harder than another class. Men, too. I have my opinion as to which class this is; this opinion I hold consistently, with reason, and with the knowledge that it is a general statement that does not hold true for all people at all times. I won’t be bullied out of it because someone with a chip on her shoulder would rather pick fights than discuss issues.

You are correct that Jennie is not deciding to be a homemaker today. However, she is opting for a lifestyle where she views that as her first, best destiny. It is presumably what she is hoping and praying for. To say that someone is hoping to become a homemaker out of laziness is akin to saying that someone hopes to become a rock star because they seek a stable home life. It’s possible for that to be the motivation, but if so it betrays a fundamental lack of rational insight.

Gee, nothing more endearing than a man who sets out to start another round of the Mommy wars. The “all the women who work outside the home sit on their ass behind a desk for eight hours” trope is just as tired as the “all women who work as homemakers sit on their ass and eat snacks and watch soap operas” trope. Borrrr—innnnngggg! Surely you could come up with better snark?

Jennie isn’t opting for the homemaker role. She’s not married. She has no kids. She has no job. She isn’t attending school. She’s sitting around the house, waiting for what, I don’t know. She’s not apt to meet a future husband that way, and her parents are probably going to pawn her off on any guy who will take her after a few years of supporting her deadbeat ass. Maybe her folks should get her a large set of luggage for Christmas.

Now, see, if this is the best argument for non-wingnut sex-ed I’ve ever seen. If these fools had a basic understanding of human sexuality, they’d realize that problem A solves problem B. You can get hot and bothered about one or the other, but you have to choose.

There’s nothing wrong with questioning the value of Christianity, but at least do it based on claims made in the Bible.

In 1 Peter 3:1-7, scripture refers to women as fellow heirs to the grace of life, and commands they adorn themselves with a quiet spirit. Genesis 1:27 says, “and God made man in his image, in the image of God he made him: male and female he made them.” Galatians 3:28 says all are one in Christ Jesus, making distinctions between slave and free, Jew and Greek, or male and female irrelevant.

Pi.

Yes, except it’s very rare that I make a public decision concerning both of us without first talking to him. The point isn’t to look like his doormat: I simply believe my conduct sets the tone for how others treat him. He sometimes picks a more bumpy fork in the road, but I trust him enough to go for the ride.

There’s been but one occasion when he’s chosen a course of action to which I objected morally, and he respected my refusal to participate. But I’ll still be there by his side, and won’t belittle him if he gets flak.

It’s easy for me, I guess, because my hubby’s a good guy not given to rash decisions or illogical courses of action. This relationship is founded on the high value we place in one another - an imperfect representation of the relationship between Christ and the Church.

does he do the same for you?