For me, it was more the creepy fact that I’d written about how ‘domestic’ was used to dismiss violence against women yesterday, and then I saw the exact thing happen in the headlines today.

It’s not clear to me from the various media reports just what the relation between the shooter and the first two victims was

Emily was his stalkee.

Is there something missing from that line? “because if” what?

On Monday, before we really even knew what was going on, I posted over at Feministe, “What do you want to bet this guy was a misogynist twit?”

I’m sure it’s not universal (or at least I hope not) but it certainly seems like every time some guy goes off on an ultra-violent bender, it’s preceded by general hatred of women . . . to the point that it’s become a predictable part of things. Christ, that’s depressing.

The other part I wanted to point out was that ‘domestic violence’ has become a way of saying ‘a pox on both their houses’. As in, “it’s nobody’s fault it’s just a domestic dispute.” Which is bullshit. It’s like how in high school they’d suspend both the bully and the kid he beat up for ‘being in a fight’ as if the victim and the attacker bear equal culpability.

In fact, the Feministe folks posted a link to a UK paper that posted a picture of his supposed ex girlfriend with the headline ‘the girl who lead to the massacre?” NO, goddammit, SHE didn’t lead to anything. SHE is a fucking victim of this psychopath! This goes beyond equal culpability into the realm of ‘it’s all her fault’.

AND, as others have pointed out, she may not even have been his ex. There may not have even been a relationship at all, and yet of course she gets blamed. Not the misogynist fuck with the gun, oh no, it’s her. She lead to the massacre.

Grrrrrrrr.